When I started writing The Cat vs. Kirk columns the competition was just a metaphor. After all, the conceit was that we were going head to head while she was asleep. But as I’ve been doing this longer it actually has led to regular bouts of head-butting.
The problem is that I used to watch movies on the TV while reclining on a love-seat, which made it easy for the cat to sleep in my lap. Now however I want to take screen captures so that these posts aren’t so visually dense and this requires me to watch everything on my computer. Now, my cat would not care about the computer versus TV debate except my computer chair is not nearly as accommodating in terms of providing lap surface area as the love seat was. Now when I spend too much time at the desk she starts head butting me and hanging around on the back of the chair and trying to break into her treat drawer, which is her favorite way to get negative attention. I have no idea where this rash of bad behavior is going to go, but at the rate that she’s been ramping up her aggression I’m about two months away from getting mauled.
Of course, none of that has to do with Collision Course, an 80’s buddy cop movie that teams up Pat Morita (best known as Mr. Miyagi from the Karate Kid series) with Jay Leno. (Yes, that Jay Leno.) I had first heard of this movie from an Everything is Terrible video labeled “Jay Leno is a Sexist Racist”, and sure enough he is both of those things in this movie. He spends most of his screen time saying horrible things to Pat Morita, who seems surprisingly nonplussed by the whole thing. There’s some solid laughs to be had at seeing the normally clean-cut Leno go over the cliff and down to the bottom of the valley of the creeps, but that’s not a good enough reason to recommend a movie, and I didn’t have enough to say about this movie otherwise.
Winner: The Cat